Felt Phenomenon

I saw it the night it opened.  How could I resist?  With a step-mum who's only as old as her shoe size (at heart) and a four-day weekend stretching ahead of me, how could Ross and I NOT go to see The Muppets?

I won't spoil a thing for any of you who have yet to see it.  It's worth it, worth it, WORTH IT.  It's adorable, hysterical, and, most importantly, it maintains the original spirit of Jim Henson's Muppets: that innocent, enthusiastic, joyful feeling of optimism that rides on the back of catchy, silly sings and shines through big, googly eyes. 

In light of the success of this latest installment, may I humbly make a few suggestions on some classics to revisit next?

"Pig and Prejudice", by Jane Austen: A pretty, prideful pig learns humility when she spurns a wealthy but misunderstood frog barrister.  Musical score by Rowlf.

"The Three Muppeteers", by Alexandre Dumas: A frog, a bear and a weirdo are all that stands between a beautiful queen and a royal scandal (regarding pearls and swine, of course!)

"Cyrano de Bear-gerac", by Edmond Rostand: A wanna-be comedian fails miserably at wooing a crowd, so he enlists a "silent" partner to help him bowl them over!  Unfortunately, the crowd falls for the weirdo instead, and the two struggle to make amends.

"Huckleberry Frog", by Mark Twain: A forward-thinking frog and his buddy, Bear Jim, a former slave, enjoy adventures on the Big River.

"The Hunchbear of Notre Dame", by Victor Hugo: A lonely bear, isolated by his duties as the dinner bell ringer on a dude ranch, learns that it's not hard to make friends if you start acting like one!

"Janice in Wonderland", by Lewis Carroll: An already spaced-out blond maiden enters a dreamlike world where nothing is as it seems...and then writes a hit album.

"Gonzo with the Wind", by Margaret Miller: A strong-willed weirdo learns how to rebuild after everything he's ever known is destroyed in a battle over cotton vs. polyester leisure suits.

"Frogenstein", by Mary Shelley: A mad scientist and his companion, who only communicates with squeaks, resurrect the lifeless body of a biology lab frog...with disastrous results!

"The Mark of Rizzo", by Johnston MaCulley: A wealthy, benevolent, land-owning rat, disturbed by the government's treatment of his people, dons a mask and cape and brings evildoers to justice...in style!

"20,000 Frogs Under the Sea", by Jules Verne:  A team of brave, felt-faced adventurers face ocean-dwelling dangers and make exciting discoveries.

"The Taming of the Sow", by William Shakespeare: A beautiful but quarrelsome pig finally meets her match through deception and a battle of wits.

(I, of course, would happily make myself available as a literary consultant for Disney.)