I can't say it was my worst New Year's ever. 'Cause there was that one time I had the flu. But this one comes pretty close. Since before the end of 2014, I've been fighting bronchitis, which my husband also caught. Fortunately, the baby didn't get it. Unfortunately, the baby did end up with a stomach bug. Which I ended up getting, on top of the bronchitis. Now, a week after my son's first ever fit of projectile vomiting, we're still all recovering.
There are a lot of "parenting secrets" my friends let me in on before I had Ronen. The ugly and awful and wonderful things that can happen when a tiny human comes to live with you. One thing that never came up was how ridiculously long the tummy flu can last in an infant. The fact that, no matter how secure that diaper is, things - horrible, terrifying things - will leak out of it, covering cute onesies and pajamas and blankies and sheets and pillows.
Ohh. Myyy.
Yes, it's been very hard watching over a sick baby for whom I can do very little. It's been mostly cuddling and napping. Which I guess might sound like a dream to some folks, maybe those who don't get to see their kids as often as they would like. But even his physical therapy has fallen by the wayside, leaving me feeling guilty about - well, everything. I was in a panic yesterday because he isn't consistently responding to his name. Yet, even sick, he figured out how to sit unsupported and will now do so happily for several minutes at a time, looking around, or holding a toy. He likes his blocks.
Yet I still worry. I think I'd worry less about his development if I hadn't gotten cabin fever lately. I could not believe how isolating it's been. The fact that the median temperature this week has been zero degrees and snowy has not helped. I also didn't realize he'd be contagious this long, and both of my parents are already in bad shape physically, so the thought of giving them the stomach bug was unbearable. So, although Ross has been an incredible help (even calling off work so he could care for the baby when I was too weak), it's still been lonely. Very lonely. I got out for the first time in over a week yesterday, and it was pretty much just to buy a new pillow. I'm eagerly awaiting the day that I can bundle the little dude up in his monkey suit (literally), strap him in his carseat and heat out without worrying about hosing things down when I get home.
I'm almost 100% better myself and looking forward to returning to a more physical lifestyle. My parents gave us their old but very nice treadmill, and two of my girlfriends and I are committing to a 5K in April. Not surprisingly, it's a superhero run, in which the participants frequently wear full masks and costumes - not just Green Lantern T-shirts. The three of us are going as the DC ladies - Supergirl, Batgirl and Wonder Woman. The proceeds go towards supporting abused children, and frankly, there are few more worthy causes out there, so it's a chance to be a real-life superhero for kids! As it is, though, I'll just be walking it unless I can get back into the swing of regular exercise. I've lost almost 10 pounds in the past 3 weeks, but I'm afraid much of that has been due to being sick and having zero appetite. The trick will be in continuing to lose as my appetite returns!
The hardest part of the past three weeks has been in feeling totally aimless. Yes, I've been sick. It's kind of an excuse. But I haven't written. Like, anything. I haven't gotten out of my pajamas most days. I just have a hard time believing this is what God wants for me. I know being a parent - an attentive parent - is about the most important task the world has ever seen, but is this it? What am I missing? I feel like I am forgetting to be myself. It's exactly what I was afraid of when I was pregnant. I need to regroup, do things that make me happy. I started this week, by re-reading Jane Eyre in two days while the baby was sleeping. Not only is it, of course, an amazing story, but it was a treat to have a real paper book in my hands again. It reminded me of who I really am. I'm at heart a reader and a learner. A scholar. A speaker, a writer, a performer, an informer, a teacher. Two projects - one promised, one potential - encourage me. On Tuesday, I will begin teaching our church's drama group, Troupe 4:12, again. (We had taken time off during the holiday, then because of the baby's sickness.) I'm honored that my pastors have given me literally carte blanche with this group. It's not a Bible class. I teach theatre history. We rehearse plays. We work on improvisation. I'm excited to add more structure to the workshops this year and watch the kids improve their skills even more. I also have the freedom to write and perform my own work, and, frankly, for this control freak, being able to write and direct and cast my own pieces is a dream come true. Even if it's on a small stage and just for my church.
The other potential project is a reunion of sorts - maybe. A few college pals and I got the crazy idea for a staged reading of William Shakespeare's Star Wars. More on that as - if - it develops. It's something to hope for!
Showing posts with label New Year. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New Year. Show all posts
Sunday, January 11, 2015
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Getting Even S.M.A.R.T.er!
I guess it's all right to start the New Year with something different, isn't it? Well, this is my first "blog-by-request" and it's a response to my friend Dawn, who wanted to know more details about S.M.A.R.T. goals, which I referenced earlier this week.
I was never taught where the concept came from, but the process is used in many, many corporate environments. But it certainly shouldn't be confined to big businesses, which is why I took it upon myself to teach our teenagers about it. The basic idea is that a goal cannot be accomplished without first creating a game plan. The acronym S.M.A.R.T. actually stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Time-Sensitive.
In order to better explain, let me use a common goal - one of my resolutions, in fact, and one that probably millions of Americans are probably thinking about, especially today: getting healthy! I don't have a problem sharing my stuggles, so I'll use myself as the example. The goal of "getting healthy" is a noble one - but doomed to fail unless it is more specific. For a fourteen-year-old in my youth group, for example, "getting healthy" could be as simple as joining a sports team at school. For a person recently diagnosed with cancer, "getting healthy" is a completely different vision. So I need to create a SPECIFIC goal. For me, losing about 35 pounds and being closer to a normal BMI for my height would be "getting healthy". (I should note that BMI charts do not take into consideration body type, so even though a girl my height is considered "healthy" at 90 pounds, I have too many curves for that to be an ideal weight for me! Plus I don't want to have to shop at Justice for my entire adult life. Sheesh.)
Part of defining your goal includes how you'll realize when you have accomplished it! This is why a goal must be MEASURABLE. If it's too vague, you have no way of knowing you've done it. Since I gave myself a clear-cut goal, the scale will tell me when I have reached it. Another part of your goal being measurable includes the steps you plan in order to reach it. including actions you'll take, accountability, rewards along the way, and methods of getting back on track if you slip up. Here's how I made my goal measurable: 1.) I downloaded an app for my phone called MyFitnessPal and it helps me track my calories. Also, through the network, I can connect with other people trying to lose weight. Specifically, I am trying to add female friends in the Pittsburgh area around my age, Christians if possible, so we can encourage each other along the way. 2.) I will weigh in once per week. 3.) I will not "get down on myself" if I overeat one day, but I will also not use it as an excuse to quit. 4.) I want to lose 32 pounds by my 32nd birthday (November 15, 2013). That gives me a very clear end in sight!
A goal is unreasonable if it's not ACHIEVABLE for you. For example, with lots of determination and excellent planning, I am certain that a person could lose 30 pounds in just a few months, rather than almost a year. However, I am not a determined person nor am I an excellent planner. Giving myself more time allows me the chance to make gradual changes, which I am more likely to keep, moving forward.
In addition, the goal has simply got to be REALISTIC. Winning the lottery might be a great dream, but dreams and goals aren't the same! There is nothing wrong with dreaming. It's what makes us human and gives us ambitions and desires and imaginations. But dreaming cannot bring anything to pass. Unless we're talking Inception, here. Which we're not. Unless you know something I don't know.
Hand-in-hand with making your goal specific and measurable, it's got to be TIME-SENSITIVE. Let's go with the weight-loss example again. Losing 15 pounds in 15 weeks and losing the same amount of weight in 6 months would require very different plans. Which suits your goal?
Some other things to consider when setting goals are the same thing your grade-school English teacher pounded into your brain: the five W's!
Who will help you reach your goals? Who has already reached a similar goal?
Why is the goal important to you?
What is your plan, and how will you stay on track? What steps will you take?
Where will you be when you've reached your goal?
When you rach your goal, how will you celebrate?
It sounds bookish, but once you come up with a plan, write it down - step by step. Tell someone you trust about your goal. Put it on facebook. Whatever you need to do to keep yourself focused on your goal!
Which reminds me...I should probably have my teenagers post their goals on a board we can all see - so we can all help each other achieve success!
Again, best wishes for an exciting and peaceful 2013!
I was never taught where the concept came from, but the process is used in many, many corporate environments. But it certainly shouldn't be confined to big businesses, which is why I took it upon myself to teach our teenagers about it. The basic idea is that a goal cannot be accomplished without first creating a game plan. The acronym S.M.A.R.T. actually stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Time-Sensitive.
In order to better explain, let me use a common goal - one of my resolutions, in fact, and one that probably millions of Americans are probably thinking about, especially today: getting healthy! I don't have a problem sharing my stuggles, so I'll use myself as the example. The goal of "getting healthy" is a noble one - but doomed to fail unless it is more specific. For a fourteen-year-old in my youth group, for example, "getting healthy" could be as simple as joining a sports team at school. For a person recently diagnosed with cancer, "getting healthy" is a completely different vision. So I need to create a SPECIFIC goal. For me, losing about 35 pounds and being closer to a normal BMI for my height would be "getting healthy". (I should note that BMI charts do not take into consideration body type, so even though a girl my height is considered "healthy" at 90 pounds, I have too many curves for that to be an ideal weight for me! Plus I don't want to have to shop at Justice for my entire adult life. Sheesh.)
Part of defining your goal includes how you'll realize when you have accomplished it! This is why a goal must be MEASURABLE. If it's too vague, you have no way of knowing you've done it. Since I gave myself a clear-cut goal, the scale will tell me when I have reached it. Another part of your goal being measurable includes the steps you plan in order to reach it. including actions you'll take, accountability, rewards along the way, and methods of getting back on track if you slip up. Here's how I made my goal measurable: 1.) I downloaded an app for my phone called MyFitnessPal and it helps me track my calories. Also, through the network, I can connect with other people trying to lose weight. Specifically, I am trying to add female friends in the Pittsburgh area around my age, Christians if possible, so we can encourage each other along the way. 2.) I will weigh in once per week. 3.) I will not "get down on myself" if I overeat one day, but I will also not use it as an excuse to quit. 4.) I want to lose 32 pounds by my 32nd birthday (November 15, 2013). That gives me a very clear end in sight!
A goal is unreasonable if it's not ACHIEVABLE for you. For example, with lots of determination and excellent planning, I am certain that a person could lose 30 pounds in just a few months, rather than almost a year. However, I am not a determined person nor am I an excellent planner. Giving myself more time allows me the chance to make gradual changes, which I am more likely to keep, moving forward.
In addition, the goal has simply got to be REALISTIC. Winning the lottery might be a great dream, but dreams and goals aren't the same! There is nothing wrong with dreaming. It's what makes us human and gives us ambitions and desires and imaginations. But dreaming cannot bring anything to pass. Unless we're talking Inception, here. Which we're not. Unless you know something I don't know.
Hand-in-hand with making your goal specific and measurable, it's got to be TIME-SENSITIVE. Let's go with the weight-loss example again. Losing 15 pounds in 15 weeks and losing the same amount of weight in 6 months would require very different plans. Which suits your goal?
Some other things to consider when setting goals are the same thing your grade-school English teacher pounded into your brain: the five W's!
Who will help you reach your goals? Who has already reached a similar goal?
Why is the goal important to you?
What is your plan, and how will you stay on track? What steps will you take?
Where will you be when you've reached your goal?
When you rach your goal, how will you celebrate?
It sounds bookish, but once you come up with a plan, write it down - step by step. Tell someone you trust about your goal. Put it on facebook. Whatever you need to do to keep yourself focused on your goal!
Which reminds me...I should probably have my teenagers post their goals on a board we can all see - so we can all help each other achieve success!
Again, best wishes for an exciting and peaceful 2013!
Monday, December 31, 2012
Playing It S.M.A.R.T.
This weekend, I taught the youth group about goal-setting. (Yes, we teach the kids both spiritual truths and "practical" ones...but so much the better when those two can be combined!) I used the S.M.A.R.T. goal model that I was taught at Starbucks. The kids giggled a little about how corny the acronym was, but, you kow what? I think they understood it. Some of the kids came up with really awesome, lofty goals - one wants to open a day-care, another wants to own a dance studio. Some goals were a little simpler - to improve grades or to lose weight. But I was proud of all the kids, because they took the lesson seriously and really thought hard about something they want to accomplish or change about themselves.
So I decided, on this last day of the worst year of my life, that I'm making some changes, too! I'm not trying to look at these decisions as resolutions, because for me, ike many of you gentle readers, resolutions have a sneaky way of getting broken rather quickly. I'm making these changes to improve the quality of my life - spiritually, emotionally, and physically. So, these are the things I'm going to try to commit to in 2013...
1. Lose 32 pounds by my 32nd birthday! This gives me 10 1/2 months to gradually lose weight by making healthier choices daily - not by starving myself (pfft, like that ever works anyway). It also filters in time for me to make mistakes (hello, Grandma's butter cookies!) and slowly adjust to comsuming less calories. If I were a more determined person, I could accomplish this more quickly, but I know myself. THIS is the way to set myself up for success! My resources include my friends on MyFitnessPal, an app/website that helps count calories and connect me with other like-minded people. In addition, I'm trying to bake more of my own sweet treats, rather than buy them, so I am more conscious of what ingredients go into them. My reasons for this goal include: avoiding the health problems that plague my family (diabetes, heart disease, etc.) and having more self-confidence. I am also hoping that, by becoming healthier, my chances for having a successful full-term pregnancy may increase. The doctors have run many tests on me and there is nothing "wrong" with me, but it can't hurt either, can it?
2. Write, write, write! I have two novels running laps in my head. Each day another runner joins the mix, and yet I'm not giving them the time to spill out onto the pages, accomplishing their goals! By the end of 2013, I want to have finished and edited (and maybe self-published!?) one of my novels. Although they are both my babies and very precious to me, I think my odds are the best if I work on my superhero story, Normal Was Never Enough. You can expect updates and more blog posts about this story as I progress. I would like to sit down and write everyday, but I think that's another set-up for failure. My goal is to work on the novel three times weekly. I also want to make sure I am updating all three of my blogs at least once weekly.
3. Make God my number one priority. I love Jesus. I've been a Christian for (now, I think it's official) over half of my life. But it's becoming increasingly easy for my to put other things first. I want to reverse that trend and make more time for the Lord in my daily life. I know there's not a simple trick to this. But I'm asking God to help me fall in love with Him again first. Everything else will follow.
4. Keep my friends close. I have been blessed with a number of wonderful, supportive, funny, beautiful and loving friends. Yet during the past year - probably because of all the trauma we've endured - I've found myself pulling away from companionship. Part of it deals with that self-consciousness issue I mentioned above. Am I just the "funny fat friend"? Am I really cool enough to be hanging out with these incredible girls? I am realizing that asking myself those questions is actually a sign that I need to spend less time alone. Because who thinks like that? No one should! My goal is to try to spend a little time with one (or more) of my girlfriends at least every two weeks. Even if it's an hour-long stop at Starbucks between one woman's mommy duties. It would really benefit me to get out of the house, anyway!
5. Get. A. Job. This is probably the most urgent of my goals, for financial reasons as well as psychological ones. I thought that being unemployed would mean that I would have more time and opportunity to work on my hobbies and take care of the house. Well, it did. But being unemployed certainly didn't suddenly give me the desire to wipe counters or scrub toilets. Why did I think that it would? I have no idea. I need a job to help support Ross in taking care of our financial needs, but I also need a job to give myself more structure and human interaction - even on the days when I prefer my pets over other people! I should mention that I have received a few offers and am still considering some of them, but right now I'm still waiting on hearing from My Dream Job with the Carnegie Library. (Those of you who pray may want to offer up a few pleas for me, since I really feel this is the perfect fit for me, but I probably won't hear anything until the end of this week at the earliest!)
6. Be a better wife. It's not about being more submissive, or more meek, or more docile. I want to be a better support for my husband, who is truly the greatest man in the world to me. I want to learn how to compromise more effectively, love him in the ways that best encourage him, and help him reach his own goals. I'm not saying I haven't done that in the past (almost) three years, but I know in my heart that I can do better. Step one: we both need to out down the iPhones and talk to each other. I refuse to let technology weaken my marriage!
Wow. Looking back over everything I just wrote makes 2013 look like a year with a lot of challenges in it! But I am trusting God that he will help me meet them all head-on. I'm really excited to leave 2012 behind me and shake its dust off my feet. It was a sharp and ugly bend in the road, but it's not the end, and I am truly beliving that the months ahead will be smoother, clearer, and more straight-forward a drive on the highway of life!
God knows I need it!
Best wishes, blessings and a joy-filled 2013 to all of you. Thanks for the support over the past few years. I look forward to entertaining you for many more years to come. Unless all the technology changes again; then we'll have to do this all telepathically or something.
I guess I'm okay with that. Happy New Year!
So I decided, on this last day of the worst year of my life, that I'm making some changes, too! I'm not trying to look at these decisions as resolutions, because for me, ike many of you gentle readers, resolutions have a sneaky way of getting broken rather quickly. I'm making these changes to improve the quality of my life - spiritually, emotionally, and physically. So, these are the things I'm going to try to commit to in 2013...
1. Lose 32 pounds by my 32nd birthday! This gives me 10 1/2 months to gradually lose weight by making healthier choices daily - not by starving myself (pfft, like that ever works anyway). It also filters in time for me to make mistakes (hello, Grandma's butter cookies!) and slowly adjust to comsuming less calories. If I were a more determined person, I could accomplish this more quickly, but I know myself. THIS is the way to set myself up for success! My resources include my friends on MyFitnessPal, an app/website that helps count calories and connect me with other like-minded people. In addition, I'm trying to bake more of my own sweet treats, rather than buy them, so I am more conscious of what ingredients go into them. My reasons for this goal include: avoiding the health problems that plague my family (diabetes, heart disease, etc.) and having more self-confidence. I am also hoping that, by becoming healthier, my chances for having a successful full-term pregnancy may increase. The doctors have run many tests on me and there is nothing "wrong" with me, but it can't hurt either, can it?
 |
| Dear Jesus: Thank You that these things have gone out of style... |
3. Make God my number one priority. I love Jesus. I've been a Christian for (now, I think it's official) over half of my life. But it's becoming increasingly easy for my to put other things first. I want to reverse that trend and make more time for the Lord in my daily life. I know there's not a simple trick to this. But I'm asking God to help me fall in love with Him again first. Everything else will follow.
4. Keep my friends close. I have been blessed with a number of wonderful, supportive, funny, beautiful and loving friends. Yet during the past year - probably because of all the trauma we've endured - I've found myself pulling away from companionship. Part of it deals with that self-consciousness issue I mentioned above. Am I just the "funny fat friend"? Am I really cool enough to be hanging out with these incredible girls? I am realizing that asking myself those questions is actually a sign that I need to spend less time alone. Because who thinks like that? No one should! My goal is to try to spend a little time with one (or more) of my girlfriends at least every two weeks. Even if it's an hour-long stop at Starbucks between one woman's mommy duties. It would really benefit me to get out of the house, anyway!
5. Get. A. Job. This is probably the most urgent of my goals, for financial reasons as well as psychological ones. I thought that being unemployed would mean that I would have more time and opportunity to work on my hobbies and take care of the house. Well, it did. But being unemployed certainly didn't suddenly give me the desire to wipe counters or scrub toilets. Why did I think that it would? I have no idea. I need a job to help support Ross in taking care of our financial needs, but I also need a job to give myself more structure and human interaction - even on the days when I prefer my pets over other people! I should mention that I have received a few offers and am still considering some of them, but right now I'm still waiting on hearing from My Dream Job with the Carnegie Library. (Those of you who pray may want to offer up a few pleas for me, since I really feel this is the perfect fit for me, but I probably won't hear anything until the end of this week at the earliest!)
 |
| Still not quite sure how I landed such an amazing guy! |
6. Be a better wife. It's not about being more submissive, or more meek, or more docile. I want to be a better support for my husband, who is truly the greatest man in the world to me. I want to learn how to compromise more effectively, love him in the ways that best encourage him, and help him reach his own goals. I'm not saying I haven't done that in the past (almost) three years, but I know in my heart that I can do better. Step one: we both need to out down the iPhones and talk to each other. I refuse to let technology weaken my marriage!
Wow. Looking back over everything I just wrote makes 2013 look like a year with a lot of challenges in it! But I am trusting God that he will help me meet them all head-on. I'm really excited to leave 2012 behind me and shake its dust off my feet. It was a sharp and ugly bend in the road, but it's not the end, and I am truly beliving that the months ahead will be smoother, clearer, and more straight-forward a drive on the highway of life!
God knows I need it!
Best wishes, blessings and a joy-filled 2013 to all of you. Thanks for the support over the past few years. I look forward to entertaining you for many more years to come. Unless all the technology changes again; then we'll have to do this all telepathically or something.
I guess I'm okay with that. Happy New Year!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)